April 9, 2014
At times I sit and watch my oldest daughter Kate in utter amazement. She boldly attempts things without any fear of failure. I cringe on the inside and think to myself all the millions of ways it could go wrong.
One particular instance comes quickly to my mind. She was only 7 at the time and had been taking violin lessons for only a few weeks. There was a recital in which some of the older and more experienced students would be participating and her instructor asked her to join them and play a few simple songs. Now, obviously Kate, practiced. She practiced hard.
The day came when she was to play and I was convinced she was not far enough along in her lessons to undertake the daunting job of playing publicly in front of a crowd. Especially not on the violin. It truly is an unforgiving instrument (trust me, I’ve heard hours and hours of practice). And yet, to my shame, Kate boldly stepped up to the center of the stage, placed her violin on her should and proceeded to play the two songs she had been practicing. And she did wonderfully well.
Reflecting on that performance now I’m struck with what I would consider childlike bravery. It’s something I think becomes lost as we become older. We lose the ability to place ourselves in uncomfortable or challenging situations. As adults we try to shelter ourselves from potential failure. We convince ourselves that we’re protecting ourselves from embarrassment – and perhaps we are. But at what cost?
If we were to exhibit more of a childlike bravery where we boldly step forward and attempt things without the fear of failure. If we dare to place ourselves outside our comfort zone, challenge the status quo and truly be brave on the stage in front of the crowd…what could we achieve. Perhaps we would fail.
Perhaps we would be met with jeers and scoffing. But possibly, just maybe we would do wonderfully well.
The Other Side
But that’s only half the story. Here’s the other half. As her parent I consider it my duty to protect her. To somehow take it upon myself to keep her from failing as though I’m doing her some favor. It’s a difficult task because I find myself wanting to stop her too often. But that’s not truly protecting her, that’s doing her the greatest disservice imaginable. Taking away her possibility of failure also takes away any chance of success as well. Keeping her from trying also takes away her optimistic bravado. I take away her childlike faith.
Even as adults we should be careful in the advice we give to others. Be mindful to not squash the dreams of someone else in an effort to falsely protect them. Taking away the possibility of failure will also ruin any chance of them realizing success. We should encourage each other to dream and explore and attempt great things. And so I encourage you – be bold. Try something new. Don’t be afraid of failure. Follow your heart and be brave.